Take This One On!

As if you needed one more excuse to sit on the couch all day and read? Well, Katie McGarry does it again in Take Me On, the fourth book in the Pushing the Limits series of companion novels. And you won't be able to say no to West and Haley, mark my words!

Haley was a champion kickboxer, until everything went wrong. She also had a fairly normal life until her father lost his job, they lost their house, and the whole family had to move in with her short-tempered uncle. For Haley, there is no such thing as normal anymore. When she quit her grandfather's gym and started training at the competitor gym, she alienated her entire family on top of that- all for some guy who ended up ruining her entire love for the sport anyway. Now all she can do is pray she can somehow eke out a scholarship to get the hell out of that house.

West is an over-privileged brat, and he knows it. Unfortunately, he is also headstrong, defiant, and always looking for a fight as well. When his impulsive actions send his sister into life-changing danger, he doesn't need anyone to beat him up for it. He is already beating himself up enough. When his father finally kicks him out of the house, no one expected what would come next. West decides to make it on his own. From living in his car while it still has a little gas, to going to the local public school, to finding a job so he can eat, everything changes. But not as much as it changed the moment he met Haley.

When he stops a couple of thugs from hurting her, he didn't realize it would change his life forever. The fight he got into might have been the catalyst for getting kicked out of his house, but it also brought him to Haley. Thinking he was the knight in shining armor, it was like the world had been turned inside out to wake up and realize someone else had done the damage to the other two guys- Haley. Now those guys want to make him pay in the only way they know how- a fight. Challenged to a no-holds-barred fight, Haley must now train West in the hopes he won't get killed in the cage. The problem is, her grandfather owns the gym, and fighting is the last thing Haley ever planned on doing. But she will, to make sure West stays alive!

OK. If you read my reviews, you know I LOVE Katie McGarry. Seriously? I would read ANYTHING this woman wrote. She knows how to write contemporary with a background of romance but a bulk of character and a winning plot like so few authors can today. She belongs in the same crowd as Dessen and Perkins with these books because I a) know I am going to love them and b) am always surprised by what is happening even though I know I am going to love them! She does it to me. Every. Time. So I walked into this story knowing it was going to be fabulous, but clearly curious about how it was going to stack up to Isaiah's story, which I loved unconditionally. Well, West wasn't Isaiah, but I loved him all the same. And Haley? There are no words!

Haley almost reminded me of Eleanor from Eleanor and Park. I loved her for that. She had a clear set of baggage she dragged around with her, and it took you almost the whole book to find out the true depth of those issues. I didn't pity her, but I did struggle with seeing her try to put on a strong, brave face in the midst of everything around her. You just wanted to protect her, but you knew she had to learn to fight back on her own. 

I also loved a few more important themes I found repeating in this series:

1. Romance doesn't need wishy washy woman. I like a romance with a sassy lead, and McGarry always delivers!

2. I love the guidance counselor. So often they are the butt of jokes, but I have known some great counselors, and McGarry always seems to put her in there. She helped Noah and Echo and never stopped! 

3. Boys need love too. None of those stone cold boys in McGarry books. They can be strong and manly and still have deep emotions. I love it! 

4. Girls. Kick. Butt. Cars? Kickboxing? You name it, McGarry's girls do it. I love this gender stereotype busting. It is fantastic and doesn't fail to give new perspective to young woman. 

5. People make mistakes. But you have to forgive and move on. 

So give West and Haley a piece of your heart. And, Ms. McGarry, if I don't get an Abby story soon? There is going to be a kind and praising email that also begs, bribes, and pleads for one! So save us all the time and pitiable begging, and just give Abby a book.... PLEASE?!

Eleanor and Park Stole My Heart

Every now and then a young adult book comes along that instantly transports us back to our own adolescence, for better or worse. It can be a painful or a beautiful journey (more often than not, a little of both), but it takes a talented author to do so effortlessly. In Eleanor & Park, Rainbow Rowell tells you a story of two misfits that will leave you forever changed. 

Since her mother brought Eleanor back to the house, she, and everyone else, has had to walk on eggshells. Their stepfather is not a nice man, and in particular, he hates Eleanor. In a house as tiny as theirs, it is all but impossible for her to escape him. Sharing a bedroom with her four siblings, worrying about whether or not they will have food each night, and listening to Richie beat her mother are just some of the reasons Eleanor has no interest in seeking friends in her new school. Never mind the fact that she dresses weird (in whatever her mother gets her from Goodwill), she isn't the skinniest girl, and her flaming red hair has a mind of its own. When she steps foot on the bus that first day, no one will let her sit down... until Park lets her sit with him. 

Park isn't a complete outcast, but he isn't popular by any means either. He tries very hard to keep his head down and blend into the background. When he sees Eleanor, he feels bad, but girls like her are who keep the vicious attention of his peers off his own faults. Taking more after his Korean mother, he has always been too gentle, too feminine, and not manly enough for his former soldier father. He doesn't intend to be anyone's hero, but he can't let Eleanor stand in the aisle of the bus and cry the way those beasts want her to. So he tells her to sit. And that changes everything. 

Eleanor and Park don't talk. He reads his comic books and she carefully tries to read them without letting him know she is peaking over his arm to see. He notices her reading the comics and starts turning the pages slower. Then he starts bringing her comics to borrow. All of this happens without a word shared between the two, but slowly, glacially, Park avoids Eleanor less and less. A few careful questions here, a kind gesture there, and the two find the human interaction they miss the most at the end of each day are the interactions they have together on those bus rides. But Eleanor has a lot to hide and is the target of many a malicious teen. And Park is very conscious of how her proximity affects his ability to camouflage himself from the other kids. Their backgrounds, self-consciousness, and situations should have prevented them from ever getting to know one another, but sometimes life's circumstances can't stop love from blossoming, no matter how hard it tries. 

There is something you should know before you read this book. It has been raved about by bloggers, reviewers, booksellers, and readers everywhere. They are right. John Green gave this clip for the New York Times Book Review: "Eleanor and Park reminded me not just what it's like to be young and in love with a girl, but also what it's like to be young and in love with a book."  He was right. Yalsa, Printz, and every other professional in the field loved this book. They were all right. If you are anything like me, you develop an immediate bias against a book when it receives instant and passionate acclaim. Why? I don't know. I guess the little rebel in us doesn't want to love what everyone loves. But that stupid generalization keeps us from books like Harry Potter, The Fault in Our Stars, and Eleanor & Park, so let's just stop this nonsense already, ok?! Because if we miss out on amazing books like this one, we are just silly little rebels who have lost out on a chance to read some seriously amazing books. 

Eleanor and Park was the saddest and most achingly romantic story I have read since The Fault in Our Stars. Eleanor is a girl who just needs life to cut her a break, but no one stands up for her. Until Park. And he doesn't do it willingly at first, but when he does, you know it goes against every ounce of self-preservation inside him. And it is that simple act of sticking his neck out for this girl that will make you love him unconditionally. Park isn't perfect. Even Eleanor knows she embarrasses him, but he wants to be a better person, and more importantly, he can't imagine life without Eleanor. I loved this boy. I really did. My heart broke for Eleanor, but I loved Park. And his life wasn't tulips and daisies either, but it couldn't compare to the war zone she lived in. 

I imagine some critics of this novel might find fault in the love between Eleanor and Park, but you have to think of the lack of love they have both lived with. Park can never be enough to satisfy his father. Eleanor's own mother left her with a neighbor for a year because Richie didn't want her in his house. For two damaged kids, finding that love was transformational, both for them and for you, as the reader. Rowell has the ability to make you love the main characters with a fierce protectiveness that will surprise you, and the ability to make you hate those who hurt them with a ferocity that makes you want to inflict bodily harm upon those fictional characters like Richie and the girls who bully Eleanor in school. 

This is a book that will steal the heart of any reader. Filled with fabulous 80's music references, comic book references, totally called-for foul language, and adolescence in all its ugly glory, it will change ever reader who turns that first page and can't put it down. There are some dark and dirty parts of this story that are hard to read, but they are just as important as the beautiful, innocent, guarded love that blossoms between Eleanor and park. This book is everything people say it is, and I know it will stand the test of time among readers. 

Just Like You

"I swear to you fat is not an emotion. I wish you could hear that... it'd spare you lots of self abuse."

Typically, Young Adult authors are adults. Sure, they have lived through high school and their awkward teenage years, but they aren't currently entrenched in them. Perhaps they have glorified those times, or maybe they view them like being the lone survivor of a zombie plague- all alone and waiting to be devoured by the beasts surrounding you. Either way, they aren't part of the target audience for whom they write their books. So can they make the young adults they write for believe they lived through the same situations? Yep. With one book. In Dear Teen Me, a collection of letters from the authors to their teen selves, you will get a glimpse of just how much they can connect to the teens they write for.

"You know there is no way in hell a guy like him would ever kiss a girl like you, you think."

There are moms who left. Left behind was a girl who had to raise her younger siblings and needed her grandmother to buy her first bra for her. Dads who left an never called, creating an almost obsessive need for attention of any kind. There was a dad who suffered from mental illness in a way that devastated her childhood. And there were great parents who loved, comforted, angered, yelled, supported and loved some more.

"Here's the thing: You're a freak. Always were. Always will be. One day you'll love this about yourself. But right now you hate it."

There are band geeks, theater dropouts, book nerds, smart kids, dancers, jocks, chubby kids, and so much more. Some had a defining moment like when Big Bern (scary Sister Bernard Agnes) recognized you were a fish out of water and suggested you spend some time in the library, the exact spot where you finally fit in. Some just floated through, realizing only now that they missed an amazing opportunity. But they all have something in common. They had no idea who the hell they really were and who the hell they were going to be one day. And that was OK. Because eventually, they would know. 

"The goose egg on your forehead will heal, but the loose thread in your moral fiber is probably still there to this day."

There were bullies. Some were expected, and some were unexpected. Those were inexplicably sadder. Sometimes the bullied became the bully just to turn the tide a little bit. There were cruel taunts and jabs that will stay with you forever. But there were friends. A girl who let you know it is OK to stop worrying about homework and tests and just be free. Friends who want to play Dungeons and Dragons or belong to the breakdancing group right along with your rhythm-less self. And did you know Lauren Oliver and Elizabeth Miles were friends in school?! How awesome and crazy is that?!

"Keep dancing by the highway, you splendid little dork."

There are first crushes, first kisses, and attempts to lose your virginity. There are milestones and drudgery, but it is all that time you need to spend finding yourself, losing yourself, and finding yourself again. This is all the advice you wish someone had told you when you were a teenager, but then you stop and realize even if they had told you, you would have ignored them and made those same mistakes again. This book should not only be read by students from middle school through their young adult years, but also adults as well. Parents, teachers, and just the woman debating whether or not to go to her high school reunion because she was once an awkward young girl who dreaded every day of high school. I loved this collection. Loved it. And there is nothing you will ove more than watching someone realize those very authors you look up to were struggling through the same horror show you went through during adolescence. (And not Rocky Horror Picture Show, kind of horror either. There was no bustier and singing. This was more like Jason and hockey mask). 

"PLEASE stop pretending you don't know the answers in math class! It's okay to be smarter than they boys. Really. They'll get over it."

There are No Limits

Do you know that feeling when a book far surpasses the expectations you had for it? When you read a book and think to yourself, "It is so good I don't want it to end!" When I started katie McGarry's Pushing the Limits, I expected teen romance. What I got was so much more.

Echo was once the popular girl with everything going for her, but two years ago she fell off the grid. Her brother died in Afganistan, her mother disappeared, and her father married her former babysitter, but Echo has a secret almost no one knows. Her arms are horribly scarred from something that happened to her at the hands of her own mother, something so terrible Echo has repressed all memories of that day. Living life like an empty shell, Echo is back in therapy, but something is different this time.

Noah lost his parents in a house fire, lost his brothers to foster parents, and the only thing that keeps him in line is the idea that he might get them back when he turns 18. After punching his first foster father (who was abusing his own son), Noah has been bounced from house to house, but he has been at this house with his foster brother and sister for a while. Isaiah and Beth are just as damaged as Noah, but together they make a decent but dysfunctional little family who actually care about each other. But when Noah continues to press the courts and the system to get more visitation with his brothers, their foster parents block him every time. In order to appear to be following the rules, Noah agrees to therapy to deal with everything he has lived through... as long as getting his brothers back is the end result.

What Echo and Noah don't expect is to be put together with Echo tutoring Noah by their mutual therapist. It seems like it would end in disaster, bad boy with tattoos and little rich girl with everything she ever wanted, but their mutual demons give them something in common. Two people who have not had the happy loving lives all children should have find comfort and respect in one another. Together they fill in each other's empty spaces until they become whole again. But there is more at stake than anyone understands. With the emergence of every repressed memory, Echo gets closer to the terrifying truth of what her mother did to scar her, physically and emotionally, and with everything Noah does, his actions and choices are scrutinized to the point where he could lose all hope of getting his brothers back. They know the risks, they fight the feeling, but how can you turn your back on the one person who makes your shattered life whole again?

Oh, sweet Zeus. I loved this book. I read this book, turned the last page, closed my eyes to digest for a minute, and started at the beginning again. This book defied all my preconceived assumptions with buckets of dynamite. With 50 pages to go, my husband came into the living room to find me holding the book with a troubled look on my face. He asked me what was wrong, and I said, "I don't want this book to end!" Yes, he laughed at me a little, but it was true. I didn't want to let go of Echo and Noah. They were the most dynamic, tragic, and beautiful characters I have read in a long time. By 50 pages into this book, you know these characters so well you find yourself laughing, crying, living, and dying along with them. I couldn't believe such characters could exist... especially with such a cheesy cover!

And why would publishers choose to cheapen this incredible story with such a craptastic cover? I will never understand that, but I hope people will look beyond the cheese to see the heart of this really fantastic story. It isn't just a romantic story. There is so much more to this story that the feelings between Echo and Noah are only a fraction of what makes this story so wonderful. The writing is so raw and real you will find yourself hanging on each and every word, living the story along with them. The demons these two carry with them are so difficult to digest, and you never really know the whole story. But most of all, the sacrifice they make for themselves, for their families, and finally, for each other, is beautiful. I loved this book both times I read it and I know I will be reading it again soon. This is the kind of book that stays with you for a long time. So give Noah and Echo some life, because every page makes them just a little more real.

Trafficking Enlightenment on a Difficult Subject

Slavery is a term all our young people think is something of the past, something that happened before their time. But what too few people realize is the slave trade is still very real and in many capacities. We have hear horror stories about the human trafficking into the sex trade, but the human trafficking into the domestic trade is also very much alive and very much ignored. In Kim Purcell's Trafficked, she fights to stop the ignorance regarding a veritable slave trade that imprisons so many of the world's young people.


Hannah is from Moldova, but the family looking for a nanny wants a Russian girl, so she must watch her dialect if she is to make this work. Her friends and family warn her about trusting anyone willing to take her to the US for a job that seems to good to be true, but Hannah won't listen. She and her grandmother are barely surviving as it is, and she won't sit idle while her grandmother's blindness ruins her life for lack of money for a simple cataracts operation. So Hannah travels under a fake name and fake visa to the States, but she is very wary of her surroundings. She has heard the stories of girls shoved into brothels and sold as sex slaves and has no intention of becoming one of them. When she arrives at a home with children to take care of, she breathes a sigh of relief that she has not become another statistic.


But instantly, something feels off to Hannah. Lillian, the mother, demands to keep Hannah's papers and return plane ticket. Hannah loses the ticket but manages to hang onto her visa and passport. Then, she warns Hannah to stay away from her husband. Hannah finds this disconcerting, but the promise of $400 a week is too much to pass up over a bad feeling. She quickly settles into the absurdly long days raising this woman's children, cleaning up after the family, and even cooking all their meals, but she can't get over the fact that she is clearly a "tool" to the family, not a human being. Forced to stay in the garage instead of a bedroom and given only a few clothes, she is basically at their mercy for anything she needs. When they don't pay her for weeks and weeks, she finally asks about her wages only to find she has to "work off her debt" of the ticket and the agent to get her here. Hannah quickly begins to understand that while this might not be a brothel, she is still a slave to this family. But with no place to go for help and people who threaten to hurt your family if you leave, is there anyway to escape that slavery?


When I first saw this book, I have to say I only scanned the blurb and assumed it was the sex trade, not the domestic trade, that Hannah had been duped into. While the domestic trade seems less harmful that the sex trade, it shouldn't be discounted as less terrifying and dehumanizing, because it is still slavery at its very core.  I was also very happy to see Hannah was wary of the arrangement and on high alert for anything suspicious. I often wondered how these girls, at this point in time, didn't know about human trafficking and remain alert. It was good to see a girl who was indeed aware but whose obligation and love for her family led her to take the risk anyway. I often wonder if our students (or us, for that matter) understand the desperation that a person can reach where they would knowingly put themselves in a potentially life threatening situation in order to save their loved ones. I think Purcell did a great job of illustrating that devotion in Hannah.


My one confusion with this story was the connection of the host family to Hannah's dead parents and missing uncle. I think this story line was only dealt with superficially and detracted from the primary focus of the novel- a young girl can be held as a slave in modern day Los Angeles. With all these ties of the father to her past life, it makes this story more narrow rather than casting the terrifying large net of having this be any girl and any family. And since it wasn't properly explained, developed, and concluded, it was only a distraction in my personal opinion. I would rather have the message be out there that this can happen to any girl from any place, not just a specific girl whose mother rejected some guy who had an issue with rejection.


So I would keep this as a book for students who are old enough and mature enough to have very candid discussions about what the human trafficking situation really is. If you can't read this book with a student and openly discuss the horrifying aspects of rape and brothels and forced prostitution, or you think the student isn't mature enough to handle this accurate part of humanity, pick another book. But this is an important thing for our students to know about. Slavery isn't over. It is alive and well and can be right in our backyards. Trying to ignore it doesn't mean it goes away, it just makes us ignorant and guilty of not doing something about it. 

This is Not Just a Zombie Novel

They say "Don't judge a book by its cover," but they should also say, "Don't just a book by its blurb". With publishing houses trying so hard to sell their books, they jump to use anything from the book they think will catch people's attention, but sometimes in doing so, they alter the focus of book, maybe even mislead people. This can be very frustrating sometimes, but other times it can give you a chance to experience the book with a clean slate. Since your preconceived notions don't match up, you have to just let the book do work its magic. This is a pretty rare occurrence these days, but I treasure the experience. And experience I did with Courtney Summers' This is Not a Test. 


Sloane's idea of hope disappeared when her sister left her to suffer their father's abuse alone. She has never felt so helpless... until the world turns upside down. When the dead begin to rise, no place is safe and hope is a luxury of the past. But somehow Sloane and 5 other kids make it to the only place they could think to close off and fortify, the one place no teenager would want to make their final home... the high school.


Now that they have gotten to the school and barricaded themselves inside, the illusion of safety begins to shatter. The zombies are outside the building eager to get in and the kids inside are all too painfully aware that nothing can keep them out forever. They also know their resources won't last forever, but for the time being, they are eager to accept the relative safety of the school and hope for someone to rescue them. Unfortunately, they can't know whether there are people alive out there or whether they are all alone. But things inside the school are not all peaches and cream, either. The kids' emotions are running high, but for Sloane, the apocalypse has provided the perfect opportunity she needs: the opportunity to end it all.


While this started out like your typical zombie novel, scared people running for shelter, escaping the dead, it quickly became something else entirely for me. While there were zombies outside and the kids were clearly afraid of the world crashing down around them, this was a story of past and present and all too painfully slim future. The kids each had their own baggage and sacrifices they carried into the school building that ate away at them after weeks of hiding from the walking dead. But Sloane's is the worst. While the other kids remember the monsters their friends, family, and even parents became after the apocalypse started, Sloane remembers the monster her father was before the dead started walking. She is a deeply troubled girl whose biggest betrayal was when her sister, the same sister who always swore they were together until the end, left and abandoned Sloane to her father. I loved this character because it really resonated that no matter what happens in your future, it is near impossible to lose the memories of what happened in the past. All too often we read (OK, I read!) apocalyptic books with strong leading characters who also, conveniently, have lovely survival skills. But what about the other people? The less McGuyver-esque people? Do they make it? Or are they the first to get eaten? This book really delved into the fact that survivors will most likely be a motley crew of people, some useful, some not, some cutthroat, some willing to accept the inevitable. 


This was a real testament to the characters Summers' created. All too often in "action" type books, the characters become second string to the main character: the action. Summers remembered that the human aspect of any story is what really affects people, and so she created a story you will think about for a long time after finishing, not a book for cheap thrills. Even though this is a zombie story, the zombies are almost an afterthought or background noise, not the central conflict of the story. With so little zombie influence, this would be a book that could appeal to a variety of readers, even those not into the zombie stories. I might not give it to a really young or naive student because they would lose the subtle intricacies of the characters that make this book so interesting. So even if you aren't a zombie-phile, give this book a chance- there is more out there than just flesh eating and zombie hordes!

The Most Forbidden Love

When you think "forbidden love", I am sure you think of Romeo and Juliet. A love forbidden by others, but beautiful in reality. I have been a witness of beautiful love with large age differences, including an aunt who married a man 20+ years her senior. Looking back at those pictures, despite their age difference, my aunt and uncle were never happier than when they were together. We have seen love forbidden by religious lines, ethnic boundaries, and racial separation. So is there a love that is truly forbidden? The love Tabitha Suzuma writes about in Forbidden is not only "forbidden", it is downright taboo... so why do you feel your heart wrench for these two young adults who seem so in love?

Lochan, called Lochie by his family, is painfully shy and quiet. A brilliant young man, he is stunted in school by his almost physical inability to speak to anyone other than his own family. Maya is his younger sister. Separated by only a year, they are completely different people. Maya is more social, has friends, and even a possible interest in boys. But together, Lochie and Maya are thrust into the most difficult of childhoods you could imagine- they basically have to raise their younger siblings with little to no help from their parents. Their father left them years ago for his new family and their mother is more concerned with getting her party on and keeping her new boyfriend happy. She comes around less and less, including ignoring all the responsibilities that come with having five children. 

So Lochie and Maya must, in order to keep their family together and out of the foster system, become the parents of their younger brothers and sister. Willa and Tiffin are young enough to accept this arrangement, but Kit is old enough and angry enough to fight what little authority Maya and Lochie have over him. Life as high school students and the virtual parents of three is not only taxing on Maya and Lochie physically, it creates an emotional bond that is much, much different than how a brother and sister are supposed to see each other. Alone in their roles as parents, they find themselves drawn to each other even though they know it is wrong. They emotions for one another have never exactly been "sibling-like", but now they start to see each other in a way they know is wrong- the way a husband and a wife would see each other. Their love and desire grows with each passing day, but they know the risks of giving into their desires. They know their love is not only socially unacceptable, they know it is illegal and if they are caught, they will lose their family. And there is nothing more important to them than keeping Kit, Willa, and Tiffin together. But their desperate situation brings them closer and closer. So close, in fact, that there is no going back. Their love may be the ultimate societal taboo, a brother and sister loving each other in a way that should never happen, but to Maya and Lochie, it couldn't be more pure or devoted. Is it their fault they had the horrible luck to be born to the same neglectful mother? You can't help who you fall in love with, right?

Oh boy. I don't know how to really write this review. I actually finished this book 2 days ago, but had to step away from it and think about it before sitting down to write about it. I will admit, at first I had absolutely no interest in reading a love story about a brother and sister. I did read Flowers in the Attic like most junior high kids did in my time, but even though we knew that situation was wrong, and we found ourselves blaming it on the situation- kids locked in the attic with nothing else to do for years. But this relationship didn't have that sense of hopelessness. They went to school, had friends, and while they were trapped by their horrible circumstances, it still seemed unnecessary. But my cousin, who always gives me great book advice, suggested I had to read this book. I trust her judgment, so despite my "ick-factor" presumptions about this book, I bought it...

Now I don't know how to explain it. Actually, I wish I could convince someone else to read it because I REALLY need to talk to someone about it. Incest is nothing romantic or beautiful like other romantic tragedies we find ourselves loving, but this isn't the dirty incest you usually imagine. In fact, at one point, Lochie even researches incest by two consenting adults, and there really is none. Their situation is so rare and unheard of, they can't find any traces of other people suffering the same forbidden love. In fact, Lochie even explains to Maya that it would be considered a love of the abuse and neglect they have suffered at the hands of their parents. They know how bad their situation is, but that doesn't mean they can stop loving one another they way they do. You can't simply shut off the feelings Maya and Lochie are experiencing. In fact, you find yourself WISHING they weren't related because their love really does seem pure and unadulterated.

Then you find yourself questioning the very horror of that wish! How could you, a reader, think this love is ok? Well, you don't. Not exactly. But god, you sure are confused by everything about these two kids. This was how I felt as I finished this tragic, sad, heartbreaking story. I was so confused. I loved Maya and Lochie, and I just wanted to save them or desperately find out they really weren't related. I wanted it to be all a mistake- maybe they were switched at birth or something and Lochie really isn't her brother. Well, that wasn't the case, so I found myself even more confused. 

This book is taboo. It is hard to read, emotionally, but beautifully written. The author really crossed a boundary with her topic, but she did so in a way that will leave you both breathless and terrified at the same time. But at the same time, you have to read it. This isn't the same cheesy graphic shock-value V.C. Andrews piled into Flowers in the Attic. It is something different entirely. but at the same time, I can't think of a single student I would give this book to. Not because it is poorly written or I think it will influence our students in any way (because that is just ludicrous, to be very honest), but because the subject matter seems so black and white at the beginning and leaves you as confused as you could ever be at the end. I think it might be too heavy for a teenager who, like an teenager, has trouble defining themselves, let alone the very fabric of societal, ethical, and moral boundaries. This book will have you question everything you know to be right or wrong, and it does so in one seriously ground-shaking way. I commend Suzuma for having the guts to write about the most truly forbidden love, and to do so with such grace and beauty. If that isn't the work of a literary magician, I am not sure what is. 

Oh My God! It's Us at 14!

What were you like at 14? Did you try hard to be popular and fit in with the popular crowd? Did you lose friends in the process or forget your way as you tried desperately for the cool kids to notice you? Did labels and name brands mean a lot to you as you navigated your first year of high school? If so, whether you are a city girl or a country girl, you can all relate to Ericka (previously known as Ricky Jo when she was in 8th grade) in The Queen of Kentucky by Alecia Whitaker.


Ericka made sure no one called her Ricky Jo. She was starting 9th grade and had no intention of being known as poor farm girl Ricky Jo anymore. it was time to reinvent herself. She had a new wardrobe, she had tried out for cheerleading, and she was on the track of a new group of friends. Even though at home she still had to work in the tobacco fields, getting the crop ready, in school she was Ericka. She lucks out in home room by not only getting to hang out with the Fabulous Four (hoping to change it to the Fabulous Five), but she also sits right next to David Wolfbaker... the boy known as Wolf for more than just his name.


With a rampaging crush on Wolf, Ericka manages to carry on as cool as she can. She and the Fabulous Four have some fun together, but she never finds a way to get herself on the inside of the group. The girls always seem to have an inside joke she doesn't understand or an impromptu sleep over she wasn't invited to. The hardest part s how Ericka's transition has started to affect her best fried Luke and her friends from middle school. She wants to be a good friend, but her attempts to fit in are alienating everyone she originally cared for... and for what? Friends who usually don't seem to care about her as much as they say they do? And Wolf is the worst. She has a crush on a boy who insults her and humiliates her more than he flirts with her, but of course, he is always sweet and adorable the minute no one else is around. She has some big decisions to make: is she sweet farm girl Ricky Jo or cut-throat popular girl Ericka?


I am going to premise this by saying this girl was SO ME when I was in junior high. Everything Whitaker describes about trying to fit in, always finding yourself just outside the popular group, and always feeling sad or disappointed when they didn't include you is an exact description of most of my adolescent years. I look back to those years and cringe, which is why I struggled a little with this story at first. Not because it wasn't well-written, because it was, but because it was SO REAL! I found myself thinking, "Crap?! Did I know this author growing up?" No, but I am sure this story is a lot more common than uncommon. And the beauty of its realistic descriptions is that you feel every single emotion with Ericka. You want to tell her to tell those frenemies to go stuff it. You want her to tell Wolf that he is a total jerk. You want her to kiss Luke. You want her to play basketball which she rocks at instead of wasting her time with cheerleading. And most importantly, you want to tell her she isn't alone, that you know how she feels because you lived through the exact same childhood (possibly minus the tobacco drying in the barn). 


I think this is a great book for any girl, but the important thing to remember is that the main character is only 14. Therefore, she acts, speaks, and thinks like a 14 year old, which if you remember correctly, is a pretty bratty and immature time. So while 14 year olds would really relate to Ericka, I worry older girls might find her too bratty and annoying to give the book a chance, despite the fact that they would love it if they did. (Of course that might be because it hits too close to home about how bratty THEY were at 14!). There is a little talk of making out, but nothing too bad (the main character is mostly worried about getting her first kiss), one scene of silly slumber party streaking that showed girls more embarrassed than proud to take their clothes off, and an ugly bout of drinking that had the cautionary hangover scenes to follow. I think this is a great story for any young girl, whether she is strong and determined (even though we know that s usually a facade), or she is unsure of herself and trying to find her way. As an adult woman, if you read this story, you are bound to see a little of yourself in Ericka, whether you like it or not! And since we all remember what a nightmare it was to be 14, proceed at your own risk! But Alecia Whitaker is definitely an author to be watched! She has a fresh voice and wonderful characters and knows how to take a coming of age story and make it more... so much more!

Creepy Middle Reader

How dark can a middle reader book go? If you consider the Grimm Brother's fairy tales, they can be awfully grim (yeah, yeah, bad pun attempted!). In fact, I have often bought these classic fairy tales for baby showers, thinking I was doing a nice thing. After reading more and more of them this year, I realize I have been traumatizing all the young children in my family! So when I started reading Liesl and Po, by Lauren Oliver, I was surprised by some of the darkness, but thrilled by the charming story underneath.


Liesl hasn't left the attic since her father's death. Her stepmother makes her stay there to keep her safe. Safe from what, Liesl doesn't know. Will is the orphaned assistant of a mean and nasty alchemist. His only highlight in running the alchemist's errands throughout the middle of the night is seeing the girl in the window of the attic. That girl is Liesl. She doesn't know he is out there, but he can't stop thinking about her. He thinks about her so much that he accidentally takes the wrong box to the Lady Premiere. He is supposed to bring her a box of the darkest and strongest magic the alchemist has every made, the same magic that has taken away the sun for over 1700 days, but instead he grabs the box of Liesl's father's ashes. The box of magic is inadvertently delivered to Liesl's stepmom instead of the ashes. 


When Po, a ghost boy, comes to visit Liesl in the attic, he helps her connect to her father. There she learns her father wants his ashes brought to their old house where her mother is buried so he can finally cross over and be at peace. Po helps Liesl escape the attic so he can get her to the old house. Along the way, a series of mistakes, switches, misunderstandings, and plain old silliness leads to an adventure where Will, Po, and Liesl try to put her father to rest while everyone else in the countryside is out looking for them. What no one knows is that the magic box might be more powerful than any of them could imagine, but love is more powerful.


Some people might disagree, but I think you can have some darkness to a middle reader, especially if there is an ending where everything works out for the better. I think the Grimm's fairy tales are too dark even for my 30 year old self, of course! But this book had just enough dark and just enough softness to balance it out. You want Will and Liesl to make it to their destination, but all the mix-ups and silliness throughout the story keeps you hanging on until the last page thinking, "What could possibly happen NOW?!" I admit the story was a little hard to get into at first, and some key details weren't revealed until 1/3 of the book had passed. That, sadly, might make it too hard for the reader, especially a younger reader, to get into the book, at which point they would miss this exciting little gem!


As a middle reader, there isn't any sexual content, but there is some death and murder and Liesl is certainly abused by her stepmother. Nothing is too graphic or overdone, so the happy coincidences will balance those out fairly well. It is one of those fun stories where the circumstances change just by chance over and over again, helping the main characters out in ways they couldn't possibly know. It is a great way to make the reader feel most connected to the story- they know more than the characters do! I think this is a fun little ghost story, where the ghosts aren't what you should be afraid of!

Please Don't Ignore Vera Dietz

What happens when we put our heads down and ignore all the bad things around us? Do they just go away, or do they come back to haunt us? Please Ignore Vera Dietz by A.S. King is a phenomenal story that shows the life of an average girl who struggled to ignore what was happening around her and prayed everyone ignored her very existence. Fortunately and unfortunately, that was impossible.

Vera has been friends with Charlie since they were in elementary school. They have suffered through his abusive father, her mother leaving when she was 12, and deep dark secrets they only shared with one another. But when Charlie starts hanging out with a bad group of kids, drugs ad alcohol aren't the only changes to his life. The girl he starts dating, Jenny, is manipulative, a liar, and hates Vera's relationship with Charlie. When she tells Charlie things she swears Vera has been spreading around school about Charlie, he believes Jenny instead of Vera, who would never say such things. He finally joins the rank of the others and starts torturing Vera in every way possible, from throwing dog poo at her to telling the school how her mother was a stripper when Vera was a baby. Charlie's betrayal is more than even when her mother abandoned her.

Now, almost a year later, Charlie is dead and blamed of a heinous crime. Vera deals with her emotionally unavailable father and works a full time job in addition to going to school, just like he tells her to do. Of course, the vodka bottle beneath her car seat she uses just to get through the day and numb the pain is nothing her father would understand- especially since he has always warned her about their "alcoholic genes" they must be careful of. As Vera's destructive behavior continues, her father is desperate to save her, even if it means accepting the pain he still suffers and would prefer to ignore. What he doesn't expect to uncover is the truth behind Charlie's death.

Please Ignore Vera Dietz is a story you simply cannot ignore. Told in a series of flashbacks to the times when Vera and Charlie were young as well as snapshots of Vera's life now, it slowly gives you snapshots that add up together into a story you can't ignore. The story isn't revealed immediately, and you truly don't know everything until the very end, but you won't want to stop until you find out exactly what happened. It is one of those stories that pulls you into the whirlwind and won't let you go until it spits you out all disheveled and discombobulated.

The story has some mature content and language, but it is handled beautifully and in a way that opens up so many important discussions between you and the reader. Charlie starts selling his underwear to a perv he met on the street, but when things escalate, he doesn't know what to do. Vera knows her family's history, but can't break out of her inevitable future. Perhaps she feels she deserves to suffer like her whole family did because they had her so young. It also raises the question of when you should step in and do something when you know your neighbor is terrorizing and beating his wife and child. At what point do we need to become involved. Although this book has some mature language and content, it is just too important to censor from kids. I would suggest this story for mature middle school students through high school students, but be prepared to talk about it. Not only will your student want to talk about it, you will need to talk about it too.

Many Wounds Never Heal

Susan Beth Pfeffer has proved with this book that she is a skilled author. I read her post-apocalyptic series a while ago, and it was a character driven, thoughtful, realistic series. I am surprised she can bring that same thoughtfulness into a very, very different kind of story- one about a young girl struggle with her own demons, both internal demons and very tangible demons. This story made me think about Pfeffer in a whole new light.

Willa and her mother escaped an abusive father and ended up with a very kind man named Jack who only wanted the best for them. Jack and Willa's mothers life is a financial struggle, but Val, Jack's ex-wife, pays for her daughters to do anything they want. While Willa loves her two sisters, it is very clear there is a discrepancy between what they get to do thanks to their mother, and what Willa gets to do because her mom can't afford it. Willa barely remembers her biological father, except his temper. When frantic phone calls followed by a police visit reveal her father, Budge, may have murdered his new wife and children and is on the run, Willa feels she is living in a surreal world.

Budge was spotted outside Ohio, and is on his way towards Willa and her mother. For their own safety, they are moved to a hotel. When Budge arrives at their house, he attacks a police officer and is killed on Willa's front lawn. In a few short hours, Willa's entire life is turned upside down when she learns about his brutal murders, 4 other children, 3 of which he murdered, and the life she and her mother left behind when they ran from Texas. She decides to go back to the town to pay her respects to the family she never knew she had. It is there she learns a lot about her life, both before and after she left Texas. What Willa uncovers will change everything about the way she sees the people around her.

This is a beautiful and terrifying story all in one. The characters are unconventional, and they have very real problems. I had a lot of trouble digesting Willa's mother through most of the story, especially how she literally tread on eggshells around Jack so as to "not ruin anything". But when they stopped acting like a Stepford family and faced the troubles their family was having, I understood why she was the way she was (although I still didn't really like it). The strange relationship between Willa and her sisters was also confusing at first until it became clear they were just as confused and unhappy as she was. These characters really grew and developed as the story went along.

The story is really very deep and dark. It deals with some very heavy material that might be too much for a more sensitive reader. It isn't overly bloody or gory, but the murder is particularly brutal. The toughest part is seeing Willa suffer through so much and internalize her pain so much she turns to cutting in order to make it through each day. You just want to save Willa. You want to slap her parents and make them realize how hurt she is, even before her father came back into her life. Some of the emotions are difficult to decipher at first, but I think that is what makes the story so realistic. Although the reading level of this story would make it suitable for a younger reader, its subject matter might make it better for a more mature reader. And be prepared to have some discussions with your child or student after they are finished. This isn't a book to be taken lightly, and it proves Pfeffer is quite an adaptable author.

Dyslexics, Baked Goods, and Elvis, Oh My!

As a teacher of dyslexic students, we see the joy of a student who can finally make sense of the words on a page, the elation of a kid who gets his first "A", and the relief of our kids when they realize they aren't "defective". They just learn in a way no one has tried to teach them before! Working at The Kildonan School has truly changed my life, but that pales in comparison to how many students' lives have been changed on this campus. This year, after giving a student his term exam, which he earned a 97 on, and telling him he was receiving an A in my senior literature class, he said, "Ms. Hoyt, I have to call my mom and tell her! I have never gotten an A on anything before!" This place makes you beam with pride for every one of your students' accomplishments.

Sadly, there is another side to working with dyslexic students. Every single student comes to us with a story. Some came here young enough to have moved on from the time they suffered in schools where they were being shoved in resource rooms and pulled from classes for extra help. Most remember all too vividly the pain and humiliation of being in a class where their classmates could read but they couldn't. Some can even tell you horror stories of teachers who called them dumb, lazy, losers. They were labeled as "limited" and put in the "slow" classes. This is the ugly side of dyslexia we try to help our students overcome, but sadly we are all too familiar with it. It is also a side of the story teachers of all likes should know and understand. How does what they say affect their students? What body language can the students read to know a teacher is frustrated or has given up on them? How do they feel being pulled out of classes- especially the fun parts- to go to resource rooms and reading specialists? Joan Bauer's latest novel, Close to Famous, is a beautiful story about a young girl who never learned to read, but had aspirations so big no one could hold her down.

Foster McFee is 12 years old and lost her daddy in the war in Iraq. All she has left of him is a pillowcase full of his stuff and his letters- letters she can't read. But she hides that fact through some pretty powerful evasive maneuvers, including her natural baking ability that makes people forget everything and just focus on the cupcakes. Her passion for cooking came from Sonny Kroll, a food show star who has giving her hope in a hopeless world. She has learned to hide and compensate for her severe learning disability. When Foster's mom packs them up in the middle of the night and they take off, she knows it has something to do with her mom's Elvis-impersonating boyfriend and the black eye she is sporting.

They drive and drive until they end up in a small town in West Virginia called Culpepper. There they meet the kindest, most generous hodge podge of people ever. A husband and wife tow truck duo give Foster and her mom a place to stay, free of charge, a little boy named Macon quickly befriends Foster and introduces her to the infamous actress, Miss Charleena, and Foster even gets a "job" selling cupcakes out of Angry Wayne's Bar and Grill. The entire town is enamored with Foster and her baked goods, which seem to settle any bad situation and clear hostilities like magic.

But despite her work with Macon on his documentary and her time baking, Foster is haunted by two things- her inability to read and the pillowcase of her papa's stuff she accidentally left in the rush to escape Elvis and Memphis. Add to that the accident Sonny Kroll has, and Foster is left with nothing to look forward to. Then Macon gets sick and begs Foster to take care of Miss Charleena in his absence, and everything changes. Miss Charleena, although she seems cranky and cantankerous, seems to like Foster. When she figures out Foster can't read, she shares her own struggles in school with the young girl and starts to help her. The help is rocky in the beginning, and Foster has to overcome her own shame before they can make any real progress, but eventually Foster can read. When the book-mobile comes by, Foster gets a Sonny Kroll cookbook and can even make out some of the words!

But evil Elvis is still out there and her pillowcase is still gone. When her mom returns to Memphis to get the pillowcase, it leads the abusive Elvis right to them. But the town won't let anything happen to Foster or her mother- this is their home now and family takes care of family! The real tearjerker, though, is when Foster finally gets to contact Sonny Kroll. For a girl who couldn't read or write, a simple letter to her idol and his response is all she needs to be truly happy!

There are "warm and fuzzy" books that make you feel mushy inside and then there are books that just make you happy inside. I have always loved Joan Bauer and everything she has written, but I think this new one might be one of my favorites! She really captures the emotions and pain of a 12 year old who can't read without bringing down the tone of the story. She gives Foster the baking which is her true talent and displays how language skills don't stop someone from being really successful at something. Our kids come to us as amazing artists, beautiful woodworkers, chefs, storytellers, filmmakers, etc. They are really, really good at stuff, and that shouldn't be diminished by their language struggles. And that is just what Joan Bauer does with the utmost of ease- she doesn't hide Foster's language struggles, they are still important, but her strengths are more important!

This is a beautiful book that would be excellent for any middle reader. It can easily be used for older elementary students all the way to low-skilled high school students. The story is really well done, and the dyslexic character can be someone for the reader to understand and empathize with. Not only is this a great book for children, but it can be a real eye-opener for adults as well. I think teachers and parents alike would learn as much from this book as any young adult could! Brava, Joan Bauer. You are an amazing lady!

Required Reading for Educators and Parents

YA is a genre designed to give adolescents what they really want to read- book about similar situations and problems they experience every day, or books with characters they can relate to. When writing books for this genre, some authors manage to capture a terrifying part of adolescence all adults wished didn't exist. This happened in Wintergirls, where the story of a girl suffering from an eating disorder was so real and painful, you hurt with her. Julie Ann Peters is an author who doesn't hold anything back, despite the opinions of some that adolescents should be sheltered from such stories. In By the Time You Read This, I'll Be Dead, Peters delivers a cold, hard smack to the face where teen bullying, depression, and suicide are concerned.

Daelyn has been bullied her whole life- first for being overweight, and now for the neck brace she must wear after one of her multiple attempts to commit suicide and her inability to talk. Her parents don't understand her actions, her teachers are often part of the problem, and she has never had any friends. In fact, any time Daelyn let her guard down enough to try making friends, it has backfired in her face as some clever ruse to humiliate her once again. She goes through the daily motions, but doesn't trust anyone, including her helicopter parents who watch her every move anticipating another suicide attempt.

Then one day, as Daelyn is waiting for her mother to pick her up, she meets a persistent young man who lives and is home-schooled next to her school. She tries to ignore Santana, scare him away, and escape him in any way, but he just keeps coming back. Daelyn knows this must be a way for him to either hurt her or humiliate her, but something about Santana makes her crack the rare smile she has kept hidden for years. What Santana doesn't know, however, is that Daelyn intends one last and final suicide attempt, and this time she has enlisted the support and ideas of a website called Through the Light that helps people commit suicide. She has arranged the date of her final attempt and is now just waiting for the days to count down until she can end her torment once and for all. But can Santana give her something to look forward to? Can that be enough to stop her from taking her own life?

Like Wintergirls, By the Time You Read This is a book that should be given carefully to young adults who are mature enough to digest such heavy material, but should be required reading for parents and educators. We all remembered the bullying that took place when we were young, but do we understand its true magnitude and impact? How do we stop such bullying? How can we know it is happening? At one point in the story, Daelyn is lured into the boy's bathroom and sexually assaulted. The boys spread a rumor she was hiding in there to watch them and she is brought to the principal's office. When she tries to defend herself, she can't manage to tell the school administrators or her parents what really happened, leaving the adults thinking she is just being melodramatic about a silly prank.

This book made me terrified of the ignorance adults have towards the monster bullying has become. We can attend conferences, discuss with other adults ways to stop the bullying or teach students it is wrong, but does it work? Isn't the bullying now worse than it has ever been? How do we really attack it and protect our children from such dire circumstances that they would attempt to take their own lives? I hope books such as this one, while fiction, are an eye-opening smack in the face to all adults about just how dangerous adolescence can be.

What does "Beautiful" mean anyway?

I have had this book for a while, started it a couple of times, but never gotten very far. I finally picked it up again over the holiday and looking back, I don't know how I ever put it down. North of Beautiful by Justina Chen Headley is a beautiful story about physical beauty, inner beauty, pain, humiliation, and coming to terms with who you are.

Terra is a senior in high school who is determined to keep her body as beautiful and physically fit as possible. She obsesses over her body to compensate for the rather large port-wine birthmark that is splayed across her cheek. Despite years of trying to lighten the birthmark through painful laser surgeries, nothing has worked. But Terra has become a master at camouflage. She has enough make-up to cover her face, and sometimes her soul, from the rest of the world.

The birthmark isn't Terra's only source for humiliation. Her father is great at making her feel small and insignificant. When he isn't picking on Terra's mother for being overweight, this washed up cartographer waits for opportunities to keep his children down, humiliate them, and hurt them in anyway possible. Terra's two older brothers have escaped the tension of the household, but Terra is still stuck there. Each moment in the house is spent listening to her father abuse her mother and being torn between wanting to intervene and not wanting to be the next victim.

When her brothers come home for Christmas, Terra's father pulls his usual attack which causes the boys to leave- the eldest returning to China where he has lived for two years. When he sends Terra and her mother tickets to visit him in China, they immediately dispel the idea- Terra's father would never let them go. It takes the gentle push of a new-found friend and her son, Jacob, who offer to go with them to get Terra and her mother on the plane. Once in China, both Terra and her mother are forced to look at themselves, their lives, and most sadly, Terra's father and his verbal and emotional abuse.

This is an amazing book that put a knot in my stomach from the first word to the last. The description of the father's emotional and verbal abuse is so haunting, I felt as though I was Terra. Having known victims of such abuse, and having been a witness to such abuse, I have no idea how Headley could put those emotions and feelings on paper. I had a friend whose father was just like Terra's, and the tension, anxiety and fear Headley describes is what you felt the moment you walked into my friend's house. But at the same time, this book is beautiful. We are all flawed, but that is simply what makes us stronger.

I would recommend this book for students only if you can be sure they have never suffered this kind of family situation. I can honestly say the descriptions of the father are so painful and hurtful that if a student who had a similar home life were to read this book, the consequences could be great. However, this is an amazing book for that student who may need a "little touch with reality". We have all had the student who thinks the latest high school drama and who sat where in the cafeteria are the biggest happenings in the world. This book is certainly an eye-opener to how those silly high school dramas aren't really as important as kids think they are. My only caution is to please read this book before you give to a student and know the student you are recommending this book to- it isn't for everyone.